7 Signs of Emotional Intelligence: Which of these do you possess?

Do you have these 7 signs of emotional intelligence? We all know what an IQ is and that most of us fall within the average range. We use names like smart, intelligent, dumb, idiot, and stupid when talking about a person's level of intelligence. What most people don't know is that we also possess an EQ, or EI, which is our level of emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence is typically measured in numbers because it is that thing inside us that recognizes emotions in ourselves and others, then guides us to respond. Understanding emotions may seem unimportant or trivial but in fact it is the opposite. It is widely believed by experts that a person's level of emotional intelligence may be a better predictor of success and overall happiness than their IQ.

What is emotional intelligence?

Having a high level of emotional intelligence means that you can accurately express your feelings and take responsibility for them. People often say things like "You hurt my feelings and you shouldn't have," which puts blame on the other person for the way you feel. A person with high EI realizes the feeling belongs to him and responds with statements such as "I was hurt by that."

Being emotionally intelligent means that you can identify and manage not only your own emotions but the emotions of others too. It means you have awareness of your own feelings and are able to balance emotion and reason. You can recognize feelings and emotion in others and show empathy and compassion which is a crucial part of all relationships - both business and personal. For example, a good leader has the ability to understand what motivates others and build on that motivation.

7 signs you are emotionally smart

Although emotional intelligence is not completely understood, it has become increasingly known that it plays a critical role in our quality of life. A person who is emotionally intelligent generally has better physical health, a more positive outlook, fulfilling relationships, and is more successful than those with low EI.

1. You can read non-verbal communication: This means you are able to look at someone and know by the look on their face, the way they hold their arms, their posture, or etc. and tell what their mood is.
2. You are interested in other people and their feelings and thoughts: When someone asks you "What are you thinking about?" it shows their interest and understanding. Emotionally intelligent people want to know and understand others and genuinely listen to their answers.
3. You are emotionally resilient: Bad things happen in life - you lose a good job, your significant other moves on without you. You have setbacks and know there will be more coming. However, you also know you are strong enough to persevere until better times come. You do not internalize failure.
4. You know where you need improvement: People with low EI make the world believe they know everything and can do anything. When something goes wrong they put the blame anywhere but on themselves. If you have a high EI, you know the areas in your life that need improvement. You are always learning and therefore always growing.
5. You are aware of your own feelings: You know how you are feeling, what caused the feeling, and how to process and deal with the feeling. Your feelings guide you towards finding a solution rather than shutting you down.
6. You avoid negative self-talk: When something does not go right, even if it was by your own mistake, you do not berate and belittle yourself. You are able to acknowledge what went wrong and explore your options for solving the problem, then move forward and do so.
7. You pursue success: You have dreams and strategies to make those dreams a reality. You set goals regardless of how long it takes you to meet each one. You deal with setbacks, adjust shortcomings, and know that the only way you will lose is if you quit.

How many of these qualities do you possess? The good news is that unlike brain intelligence, our IQ, emotional intelligence can be raised to some extent. Part of our EI is innate, part of it is shaped by environment, and another part is our attitude. Are you willing to learn to understand and conquer your emotions? Are you interested in becoming a better problem solver? Do you want to achieve your goals? Developing your emotional intelligence allows you the opportunity to avoid miscommunications and misunderstandings. It deepens your relationships and helps you balance work, home, and fun in a meaningful way. Remember - the biggest determinant of success is measured by EQ, not IQ.