8 Warning Signs Someone Cannot Be Trusted

Has anyone ever broken your trust? Do you wish you could have known how untrustworthy they really were before learning the hard way? Trust is the foundation of any relationship, but not everyone deserves it. Here are 8 signs that someone may not be as trustworthy as they seem, helping you protect yourself from potential heartbreak and betrayal.

1) They Break Promises

Has this person broken promises in the past? Do they have a habit of spilling secrets they promised to keep? If you trust them with intimate details about your life, only to discover they’ve let your secrets slip, it’s a clear sign they might do it again. Trust is built on consistency, and someone who has failed to keep their promises once is likely to repeat that behavior.

2) They Hide Things From You

Does someone you know hide certain parts of their lives from you? Are they overly protective of their phone or change the subject whenever you ask about their personal life? If so, they might have something to hide. Being secretive is often a red flag that someone isn't being entirely honest with you. Be cautious about how much you trust these people, as they may be hiding things for a reason.

3) They Don’t Understand Themselves

Do you know someone who lies to themselves? For example, a friend who is loud and obnoxious yet describes themselves as shy and reserved. Their self-image doesn’t match their behavior, indicating a lack of self-awareness. These individuals may claim to be trustworthy without realizing how untrustworthy they truly are, even to themselves.

4) They Are Unpredictable

Is this person unpredictable? A 1985 study by Rempel and others discovered that predictability is a powerful measure of trust. If someone is consistent in their behavior, they are more likely to be truthful and dependable. On the other hand, unpredictability often signals a potential for betrayal, as you can never be sure of their next move.

5) They React Negatively to Everything

According to a 2015 study by Rodriguez and others, negative reactivity is a common sign of distrust. Does this person get angry with you over trivial matters? If so, they may feel insecure about your relationship. Trust grows stronger when it’s mutual; if someone doesn’t trust you, they are more likely to go behind your back.

6) They Get Jealous Easily

Jealousy is another telltale sign that trust doesn’t go both ways. Several studies have found that jealousy often stems from a fundamental lack of trust. For example, your partner might get nervous when you’re not around because they don’t fully trust you. If someone lacks faith in you, they may not deserve your trust in return.

7) They Project Their Insecurities

Do you know someone who constantly accuses you of things you haven’t done? Imagine you’re struggling in a difficult class, and when you share this with a friend, they accuse you of being a quitter. This behavior often stems from their own insecurities. They may be thinking about quitting something in their own life and are projecting those feelings onto you. Even if they aren’t intentionally lying, projection makes it hard to trust the advice they give.

8) They’re Just Too Different

A 2002 study by Debruyne found that similarity creates trust. We tend to trust people who are similar to us because we believe they understand us better. When someone is very different from you, they may not fully grasp how you think or feel, making them less likely to preserve your trust. Understanding and shared values are crucial in building strong, trustworthy relationships.

Conclusion

When someone has betrayed your trust, it’s difficult to ever trust them—or anyone else—again. The feelings of bitterness and betrayal can linger for years. So how do you know when you’ve met someone you can trust? Dependable friends and partners should be there when you need them, open up to you, empathize with your feelings, and most importantly, trust you as much as you trust them. While it’s natural to be cautious, remember that there are trustworthy people in the world. Don’t lose hope or close yourself off entirely. Do you know anyone who displays more than four of these signs? Share your experiences in the comments below!